Walking With Dinosaurs Ep1 New Blood

May 21, 2010

Walking With Dinosaurs Ep1 New Blood DivX Movie

Requires DivX player….Download here for …  Windows MAC

Requires Dolby AC3 2000 codec….Download


Live up to it

May 21, 2010

“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.” — Buddha (563-483 B.C)

VN:F [1.6.5_908]

On Loyalty

May 24, 2009

We talk a lot about loyalty. We use it to describe anyone or anything that does something for us on a regular basis. But is that loyalty? Personally… I do not think that it is. We seem to have twisted one of the true values of good men into something based around consumerism. How did that work? We now have a society full of people who believe that they are loyal to their friends, loyal to an ideal, or loyal to a business, like a hardware store, a restaurant, a job, a bar, etc. But that loyalty goes out the window when the wind changes. Husbands are loyal to their wives… until they’re not, and vise versa. It’s kind of like something my father heard from a boss of his when he was a kid, “You cowboys are all the same, and you stay till you’re gone.” When we first hear that statement, our first reaction is to deny the accuracy of it. Then when the time comes around, we all just leave to find something better or maybe just different.
That in of itself requires that we are not truly loyal. When I think of true loyalty, the first thing that comes to mind is samurai warriors of the ancient Japanese empire. I am not one of those people who believe that the eastern cultures are better than western cultures. I mean, lets think about this. The Japanese and Chinese societies gave us some of the most brutal torture methods. I’m not by any means
saying that western culture does not have its bad points either. Back on subject now… samari warriors lived and died for their emperor. They strived all day, everyday to be perfect at whatever task they had chosen. They believed that the mastery of these tasks better helped them to serve. Their very name means to serve. Unfortunately their emperor was not loyal to them, and they are no longer around. But what should loyalty mean today? I do not think it should be used in business terms for any reason. I also believe that unlike love it is a two way street. Love can be a felt by only one and just because the other does not feel the same it does not mean that they are not deserving of yours. Not so with loyalty, if one is loyal to another they will do anything to make sure that they are safe, that
nobody ever wrongs them. If they do not feel the same then they are not worthy of such devotion. Many people talk about how many friends they have, when in reality if you die of old age and you can count all of the friends that you have had without taking your shoes off, you can count yourself as very lucky. The people that we call friends are usually mere acquaintances. In the back of all of our
minds we all have a picture of true loyalty, we should just think about it more often. When we say we are standing up for something we are showing loyalty for an ideal. What we don’t know is how far we will take that loyalty. Do we possess the constitution; the depth of strength, to go as far as is needed? Are we willing to put everything we have, even our lives, on the line to protect or stand up for a friend, or something we believe in? Are we willing to reject something or some one, no matter how much we like it or how fun it may be, just because they wronged a person or ideal that we are loyal to, and hold that rejection till we die? If so, then you have at least one of the few qualities required to live a good life. Loyalty begets honesty, which in turn brings the ability to love. The ability to love is the key to a good life. As you should be able to see now, true loyalty is a value that we have let all but let go of when in reality we should embrace it in order to make our lives better.

Share this Post

The new Computer that i designed

May 6, 2009
Labs Sound Blaster® X-FI Titanium Fatal1ty Pro Series Sound Card : SB0886
$159.95 Altex.com
e-GeForce 8400GS 512MB PCI Graphics Card : 512P1N724LR
$48.00 Amazon.com
Barracuda 7200.11 SATA 1-TB Hard Drive : ST31000340AS
$90.00 Amazon.com
MD2 5.25″ Media Dashboard – Black : ULT40279
$29.95 Altex.com
Wireless-N PCI Adapter : WMP300N
$79.95 Amazon.com
M4A78-E AM2+/AM3 AMD 790GX HDMI ATX AMD Motherboard
$129.00 newegg.com
500 Watt ATX12V Power Supply w/ Tri-Color Illuminatio
$70.00 Altex.com
2GB, DDR2, PC2-6400,
800MHz, 240 PIN, CL6
$30.00 18004memory.com
2GB, DDR2, PC2-6400,
800MHz, 240 PIN, CL6
$30.00 18004memory.com
2GB, DDR2, PC2-6400,
800MHz, 240 PIN, CL6
$30.00 18004memory.com
LightScribe 22X DVD+/-RW Dual Layer Drive
$50.00 Altex.com
LightScribe 22X DVD+/-RW Dual Layer Drive
$50.00 Altex.com

The Code

January 30, 2009

This is THE guy code… Decided by a consensus of many guys… read these rules, learn these rules, live these rules!

1. If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her.

2. When questioned by a friend’s girlfriend,
you need not and should not provide any information as to his
whereabouts. You are even permitted to deny his very existence.

3. Unless he murdered someone in your immediate family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours.

4. A best man’s toast may not include any of
the following phrases, “down in Tijuana”, “one time when we were all
piss drunk”, or “and this girl had the biggest rack you ever saw”.

5. You may exaggerate any anecdote told to
your friends by 50% without recrimination, beyond that anyone within
earshot is allowed to yell out “bullshit!”. (exception: when trying to
pick up a girl, the allowable exaggeration is 400%)

6. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

7. The minimum amount of time you have to wait
for another man is 5 minutes. The maximum is 6 minutes. For a girl, you
are required to wait 10 minutes for every point of hotness she scores
on the classic 1-10 scale.

8. Bitching about the brand of free beverages
in your buddy’s refrigerator is forbidden. But gripe at will if the
temperature is not suitable.

9. A friend must be permitted to borrow
anything you own – grill, car, firstborn child – within 12 hr notice.
Women or anything considered “lucky” are not applicable in this case.

10. Falling on a grenade for a buddy
(agreeing to distract the skanky friend of the hot babe he’s trying to
score) is your legal duty. But should you get carried away with your
good deed and end up getting on the beast, your pal is forbidden to
ever speak of it.

11. Do not torpedo single friends.

12. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

13. Before dating a buddy’s ex you are
required to ask his permission. If he grants it, he is however allowed
to say, “man, your gonna love the way she licks your balls”

14. Women who claim they “love to watch
sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of
the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.

15. If a mans zipper is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything!

16. No man shall ever be required to buy a
birthday present for another man. (in fact, even remembering your best
friends birthday is optional)

17. You must offer heartfelt condolences over
the death of a girlfriends cat, even if it was you who secretly set it
on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.

18. While your girlfriend must bond with
your buddies girlfriends with in 30 minutes of meeting them, you are
not required to make nice with her gal pal’s boyfriends- low level
sports bonding is all the law requires.

19. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, do not appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.

20. When stumbling upon other guys watching a
sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress,
but you may never ask who’s playing.

21. If your girlfriend asks to set your
friend up with her ugly, whiny, loser friend of hers, you must grant
permission, but only if you have ample time to warn your friend to
prepare his excuse about joining the priesthood.

22. Only in a situation of mortal danger or
ass peril are you permitted to kick another member of the male species
in the testicles.

23. Unless you’re in prison, never fight
naked. This includes men who aren’t wearing shirts. If your buddy is
outnumbered outmanned, or too drunk to defend himself, you must jump
into the fight. Exception: if during the past 24 hours your friends
actions have caused you to think “what this guy needs is a good ass
wuppin”, in which case you may refrain from getting involved and stand
back and enjoy.

24. Friends don’t let friends wear speedos. Ever. Case closed.

25. Fives must be called at all times when
getting out of your seat. If not, your seat is up for grabs. However,
“house rules” may come into effect, in which case it is left up to the
owner of the seat.

26. Shotgun can be called on anything where a
shotgun applies., as long as you are in eyesight of the object, or it
is at a reasonable time.

27. When picking players for sports teams it
is permissible to skip over your buddy in favor of better athletes- as
long as you don’t let him be the last sorry son of a bitch standing on
the sideline.

28. If you ever compliment a guy’s six pack, you better be talking about his choice of beverage.

29. Never join your girlfriend in ragging on a buddy of yours, unless she is withholding sex, pending your response.

30. Phrases that may never be uttered to another man while lifting weights:

“Yeah, baby, push it!”

“Come on, give me one more, harder!”

“Another set and we can hit the showers”

“Nice ass! Are you a Sagittarius?”

31. Never hesitate to reach for the last beverage or pizza, but not both. That’s just mean.

32. Never talk to another man in the bathroom
unless you are on equal footing: both urinating, both waiting in line
for all other situations an “I recognize you” nod will do just fine.

33. Never allow a telephone conversation with
a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a
stopwatch nearby, hang up if necessary.

34. You can not rat out a friend who show’s
up to work or class with a massive hangover, however you may: hide the
aspirin, smear his chair with limburger cheese, turn the brightness on
his computer way up so he thinks its broken, or have him paged every
seven minutes.

35. If you catch your girl messing around with your best friend, let your states crime of passion laws be your guide.

36. If your buddy is trying to hook up with a
girl, you may sabotage him only in a manor that gives you no chances of
getting any either.

37. Before allowing a drunken friend to cheat
on his girl, you must attempt one intervention. If he can get up on his
feet, look you in the eye, and deliver a “fuck off” then you are
absolved from all responsibility. Later on it is ok that you have no
idea what his girlfriend is talking about.

38. The morning after you and a babe, who was
formerly “just a friend”, go at it, the fact that you’re feeling weird
and guilty is no reason not to jump on her again before there is a
discussion about what a big mistake it was.

39. If a buddy has lint, an eyelash, or any
other foreign object on his hair or face, under no circumstances are
you permitted to remove it. However an appropriate hand gesture may be
made to make him aware of it.

40. An anniversary is recognized on a yearly
basis, under no circumstances will anything be celebrated in an
interval other than a year

41. When using a urinal in a public restroom,
a buffer zone of at least one urinal will exist at all times. If the
only empty urinal is directly next to an occupied on, then you are
still required to wait. (Exception: at a sporting event where a line
has formed to use the pisser)

42. When coming to a room which you know is
occupied by your friend and possibly another girl, you must knock and
wait for an adequate response. If no response occurs, and the door is
locked, a 10 minute period is required before knocking again.

43. The only time dicking over a buddy for a
girl is legal, is when the girl ranks a 8 or above on the 1-10 scale.
(exception: a girl may rank from 5-7, as long as there is oral sex

44. A mans gotta scratch what a mans gotta scratch. This applies to picking as well. Let the man be.

45. No man shall ever watch any of the following programs on TV:

Figure skating

Men’s gymnastics

Any sport involving women (unless viewed for sexual purposes)

46. If you accidentally touch or brush against
any part of another man below the waist, it is an understood accident,
and NO apologies or any reference to the occurrence is necessary.

47. No man shall spend more than 2 minutes
in front of a mirror. If more time is required, a three minute waiting
period must be allowed before returning to the mirror.

48. Any dispute lasting any longer than 3
minutes will and must be settled by rock, paper, scissors. There is no
argument too important for this determining method.

49. No man will ever willingly watch a movie
in which the main theme is dancing, and if a man shall happen to view
such a movie it is only acceptable if its with a girlfriend.

50. Only acceptable time when a man is allowed to cry:

when a heroic dog dies to save his master.

after being struck in the testicles with anything moving fast than 7 mph.

When your date is using her teeth.

The day Anna Kornikova chooses a husband.

51. If a bet is made, and the challenge is
completed, then the bettor may recoup his money by immediately
completing a more daring challenge. If he refuses the challenge or
chooses not to propose one, then and only then, must the money be paid.

52. Masturbate often. (exception: if your roommate is due back within the hour)

53. If a hot girl shall happen to pass by
while you are in an arms reach of your buddy, you must, and will, tap
him on the shoulder to make him aware of the babe.

54. A man’s shoes may not intentionally match any other article of clothing on his body.

55. No comment shall ever be made to a man
about how much he is sweating. In fact, there is no need bring notice
to any body part which he may be sweating from.

56. No man shall ever allow anyone to speak ill of The Simpsons or any Rocky movie. (Exception: Rocky V)

57. You have not made any mistake if you find
that there are extra pieces after reassembling or assembling an object.
In fact, you have just found a way to make that object more efficient.

58. There are is never an occasion in which
any shirt without buttons may be tucked in. (Exception: when you are
participating in a organized sporting event)

59. Unless you are under the age of 11 or
wearing a bathing suit,, DON’T wear whitey tighty’s. It still escapes
all reasoning as to why they even make them in adult sizes.

60. Any object thrown with reasonable speed and accuracy, MUST be caught.

61. No man shall ever keep track of, or count, the amount of beers he has had in a night.

62. Under no circumstances may two non-related men share a bed or anything which can be perceived as a mattress.

63. In an empty room, car, ect., a man can not ask another man if he is mad because he isn’t talking.

64. If you jiggle more than twice, your playing with it.

65. A man shall never help another man apply sun tan oil.

66. The guy who wants something the most is responsible for getting it.

67. If your friend says “Lick my nuts” as a
way to put you down, don’t try to be funny by saying “OK” and moving
your head towards his crotch, two homosexual references in a row are
just plain scary…

68. If you say ouch, you are a pussy!

69. It is the God given duty of every man to
assist any other man that may be in need of assistance in obtaining
every guys dream (threesome with two girls)

* with every set of laws, there are
appropriate punishments. If any man shall happen to break any one of
these codes, he will be found guilty, and will, for 24 hours from the
time of the violation, be considered NOT A MAN. During this time he
will not be referred to in any masculine way, and he shall bear the
name Princess.

Blogged with the Flock Browser


January 29, 2009

Life is a test. It is only a test. If it had been real, you would have been told where to go and what to do.

No, seriously, here are some useful


I suspect you will be surprised at how well you’re doing already.

01. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

02. Memorize your favorite poem.

03. Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have, or sleep all you want.

04. When you say, “I love you”, mean it.

05. When you say, “I’m sorry”, look the person in the eye.

06. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

07. Believe in love at first sight.

08. Never laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams don’t have much.

09. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it’s the only way to live life completely.

10. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

11. Don’t judge people by their relatives.

12. Talk slowly but think quickly.

13. When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?”

14. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

15. Call your mom often.

16. Say “bless you” when you hear someone sneeze.

17. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

18. Remember the three R’s: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.

19. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

20. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

21. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

22. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

23. Spend some time alone.

24. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.

25. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

26. Read more books and watch less TV.

27. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll get to enjoy it a second time.

28. Trust in God but lock your car.

29. A loving atmosphere in your home is so important. Do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home.

30. In disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

31. Read between the lines.

32. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.

33. Be gentle with the earth.

34. Pray. There’s immeasurable power in it.

35. Never interrupt when you are being flattered.

36. Mind your own business.

37. Don’t trust a man/woman who doesn’t close his/her eyes when you kiss.

38. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.

39. If you make or have a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. That is wealth’s greatest satisfaction.

40. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck.

41. Learn the rules, then break some.

42. Remember that the best relationship is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.

43. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

44. Remember that your character is your destiny.

45. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

on religion…

January 19, 2009

Ok I am seriously tired of people who think that they can create their own church just any where… and say it is a “Christian” church that only follows what Christ tells them to do. JESUS CHRIST DIED>>> 2000 YEARS AGO… he doesn’t talk to anybody. He taught everything we need to know in his short 33 years. So for those of you who believe in these things… let me ask you…

1. Do you believe in One God the Father Almighty, Maker of all things visible and invisible

2. do u believe in one Lord Jesus Christ, the only-begotten Son of God, Light of Light, very God of very God, begotten, not made, being of one substance with the Father; by whom all things were made; who for us men, and for our salvation, came down from heaven, and was incarnate by the Holy Ghost of the Virgin Mary, and was made man;

3. he was crucified for us under Pontius Pilate, and suffered, died and was buried, and the third day he rose again, according to the Scriptures, and ascended into heaven, and seated at the right hand of the Father;

4.do u believe in the Holy Ghost, the Lord and Giver of life, who comes from the Father, who with the Father and the Son together is worshiped and glorified, who spoke by the prophets.

5. Do you acknowledge one baptism for the remission of sins and look for the resurrection of the dead, and the life of the world to come

6 . Do you believe in the four marks of the church
               1.   One…. that there is but one church of god
               2.   holy…. that said church is a worldly vehicle through which spiritual grace is delivered
               3    Universal…. that said church is for EVERYONE regardless of their walks in life, where they are from, or what they have done
               4.   Apostolic… created by Christ, passed to the apostles, and handed on from there

if you do that’s great!!!! Guess what YOUR A CATHOLIC!!!!!!!!!! Catholic is the Latin word for universal… whether you were raised Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, “non-denominational” (I put quotes there for a reason to be explained later) if you believe these things… then u believe thing necessary beliefs to be catholic. we don’t “worship” saints, we don’t worship Mary… if you do then you break question number one… the questions you just answered are word for word out of the Nicene Creed created by the First Council of Nicea (325 A.D)… to say that the church is NEVER wrong would be just plain ignorance… what is said is that it is infallible… it will not fail you… Christ said that I will strike the Sheppard and spare the flock… the church is the Sheppard and if you do what is asked by the church, unless it is perfectly clear to you that it is wrong, (such as the church asking you to lie) u will not be punished, even if god doesn’t like it. he will punish the one that started the teaching though… there are two books of the catholic church, THE BIBLE, and the catechism… the catechism in no way contradicts the bible, it is merely a more direct teaching of how to follow the bible… on a day to day basis… u may have noticed that the bible a can be kind of cryptic… what happens if you interpret it wrong? That’s what the catechism is for… to take the guess work out of it… there have been 3 official catechisms in 2000 years… do you know why that is? because cardinals, bishops, a theologians of the church have to agree before it can be published… the probability that that many religiously educated people are wrong is nil… the reason for the quotes…. if you make a church… you say that your non-denominational… you are your own denomination! Wesley started with just one church, Calvin did to, so did Joseph smith… there is no such thing as non denominational… its not possible, its just not a major denomination… now… back on topic… the teachings of the church are ONLY out of those to books… we have other books that we read, we have papal encyclicals, we have the confessions of various saints, and other things of the sort… but those things are in no way presented as the teachings of the church… they are just revered writings just someone we believe to have a slightly better understanding of his god… therefore they should be known but not necessarily followed for they are just one mans opinion… so people PLEASE quit telling me that I’m catholic therefore I worship Mary, my priest likes boys, I’m going to hell etc… We do have a prayer to Mary… it goes like this….

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee; blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

the first part is DIRECT QUOTES from the book of Luke… the second part is asking her to pray for us… have you never asked someone to pray for you? Is that wrong? Is that worship? NO it most certainly is not! if you have any questions, about anything… or want to tell me off… feel free…

yahoo – lpburke86
Gmail   – lpburke86
msn    – kd5ogu – @ – hotmail.com    <—– Remove Dashes and spaces
aol     –  me – @ – liampburke.com     <—– Remove Dashes and spaces
Phone (361) 205 – 7323
email  either aol or Gmail
MySpace – myspace.com/kd5ogu

Blogged with the Flock Browser


January 18, 2009

Ive never been much of a writer. or a reader for that matter. but i have been told that the easiest way to make your brain settle down and stop working so that i can sleep is to write about what ever is on my mind. so lets see how many times we bounce around shall we? i really like the study of cosmology, the beginnings of time. by no means am i saying that the universe created itself… logic dictates that everything has a creator. if i handed u a rolex and told you that it created itself…. ud tell me that i was insane… but im willing to bet that you nor anyone you know has ever been to the rolex factory. actually id almost be willing to put money on it that you couldn’t tell me where the factory was without looking it up off the Internet… yet for some reason you still think its insane that this rolex created itself…. WHY? because logic dictates it… and yet so many people love to believe that out of sheer randomness… this universe, this magnificent timepeice the one that that rolex is based off of…. just went bang… and there was a universe… NOWHERE in any real scientific philosophy does any thesis or theory EVER say that there is no creator… not even Darwinism, not even the “big Bang.” the big bang theory deals strictly with what happens after the universe contracted into nothing…. it never brings up what the catalyst for it is. and as far as those of you who think that evolution goes against everything “Christian” pay attention… Darwin said that man and ape SHARED a common ancestor… he never said that we came from apes… if we did there wouldn’t be any apes let… thats how evolution works… you start with one thing and you finish with ONE completely different thing. no one knows how long gods days are… for all we know everything that we know about the evolutionary process is the first hour of one day… science, religion, and philosophy all go hand in hand… you cannot possibly be successful in science without some sort of a god. man is inherently good… in all societies no matter how primitive… they have all found some sort of a deity… the more advanced they get, they find some nemesis of that deity, then as we are proving… (yet again) the more advanced we get the less we believe… and our education system doesn’t help much either… when your a little kid you learn about everything in your classes, art, music, math, science, english, history, etc… but as we get older we get to where we learn more and more about less and less… we’ve become “specialized”… what happened to the basic study of ethics, and morals… people expect their kids to act one way but how in the world are they gonna learn to do that… heck most of their parents don’t even know… its like the automotive industry… even if we fired up the blast furnaces to start our own factories again and not be dependent on japan… who would run them? everyone who ran them when they shut down is either dead or very near to it, so where would we learn to run them now… JAPAN… just perpetuating the cycle… but we have turned into a weak nation… i don’t know y but everyone sits around and complains about how bad things are… and what do we do about it? say that there is nothing we can do…. lemme ask this then…. WHATS THE POINT IN COMPLAINING? When we complain the people who listen are politicians who r gonna do what the people ask for… raise minimum wage, raise taxes on bid corporations, fight these people don’t touch these, do you know what all of those things do? they raise our cost of living… minimum wage is up? well time to raise to prices to keep profit up… taxes pas that on to, corporations don’t pay anything, the consumer pays for everything! if we didn’t, there wouldn’t be any corporations…. and to top it of…. they just get better at evading taxes… Tyco toys moved their home office the the Bahamas to avoid taxes, haliburton isn’t based out of Houston anymore…. our lack of education is killing the united states and we want to waste time complaining about everything and bickering about stupid things like gay marriage and y celebrities keep killing themselves and getting in trouble…. what we need is to fix our education system and just wait out the next hundred years its gonna take to see the effect

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Cultural Differences Explained

June 17, 2008
Aussies:   Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.
Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when
Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
Brits:     Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.

Aussies:   Believe you should look out for your mates.
Brits:     Believe that you should look out for those people who belong
           to your club.
Americans: Believe that people should look out for & take care of
Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.

Aussies:   Are extremely patriotic to their beer.
Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem-singing, and obsessively patriotic to
           the point of blindness.
Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be
           bothered to sing them.
Brits:     Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform
           the anthem.

Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.
Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.
Brits:     Pay a tax just so they can watch four channels.
Aussies:   Export all their crappy programs, which no-one there watches,
           to Britain, where everybody loves them.

Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball, and
Brits:     Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer, and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey,
           hockey, and how they beat the Americans twice, playing baseball.
Aussies:   Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in
           every sport they play them in.

Americans: Spell words differently, but still call it "English".
Brits:     Pronounce their words differently, but still call it "English".
Canadians: Spell like the Brits, pronounce like Americans.
Aussies:   Add "G'day", "mate" and a heavy accent to everything they say
           in an attempt to get laid.

Brits:     Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an
Aussies:   Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an
Americans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, & liquor
           in a backwards country.
Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, & liquor
           in a backwards country.

Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.
Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.
Brits:     Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies:   Drink anything with alcohol in it.

Americans: Seem to think that poverty & failure are morally suspect.
Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.
Brits:     Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success and failure
           are inherited things.
Aussies:   Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.
Blogged with the Flock Browser

Dalai Lama’s 18 rules for living

June 17, 2008

At the start of the new millennium the Dalai Lama apparently issued eighteen rules for living. Since word travels slowly in the digital age these have only just reached me. Here they are.

  1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
  2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
  3. Follow the three Rs:
    1. Respect for self
    2. Respect for others
    3. Responsibility for all your actions.
  4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
  5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
  6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
  7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
  8. Spend some time alone every day.
  9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
  10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
  11. Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
  12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
  13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
  14. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
  15. Be gentle with the earth.
  16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
  17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
  18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
Blogged with the Flock Browser